Showerhead Update

I've received a number of inquiries about this, so I want to come clean:

The White Thingy is here! My plan is to 'upgrade' the WaterPik installation as soon as possible, or within 18 months, whichever comes last.

The anxiety is already invading my routinely homeostatic state of solitude.

Andre the Midget

The other day I, only briefly, morphed into Fezzik, a large character played by Andre the Giant in one of my favorite films, The Princess Bride. If you're wondering - for purposes of this story - yes, I would rather have morphed into Westley (played by Cary Ewes), and would have but for two items:

1) For me, black bandit masks inspire claustrophobic seizures and
2) I looked in the mirror this morning and, sadly, I more strongly resemble Fezzik than Westley

So Fezzik it is!

You may recall that Fezzik and Westley enter into a rhyming competition prior to a mano-a-mano fight which culminates in Fezzik's demise. So I'm talking to a friend and he, quite innocently, asks me “how is it going?” and, for whatever reasons, I replied as follows:

"Well, 2010 was a year of learning…..
Hopefully 2011'll be a year of earning
Because there are many things for which my wife is yearning
Which has left my stomach continually churning."

I don't know where this eruption of relevant nonsense came from, but for the record I am publicly referring to whatever impulses caused this outburst as a gift though madness crossed my mind again and again and again and again.

So, for 2011, instead of monotonously wishing everyone a Happy New Year, I want to wish you all a Wonderful Year of Earning (including moi).

Yippee!